1940-something to 2008...times have changed? Maybe not.

My Grandpa tells a story in his memoire about my Grandma back when they were relative newlyweds. My Grandpa was an inventor/farmer, and a forward thinking man. So when he built their home in the late 1930's he wired it for electricity, even though it was not yet available in their rural area.

He relates the day some years later, when walking up the lane from a day in the fields, that he sees my Grandma- then a young 1940's housewife- running and skipping down the lane towards him, while behind her shone the bright lights provided by their new hydro service, gleaming out of every room of the house! Her joy and pleasure was shining out of her face with the same brilliance of the new lightbulbs throughout their house.

This story sticks in my mind and memory...not only b/c it's hard to equate that young housewife with the much older, calm, and roly-poly Grandma of my memories with the picture he paints, but b/c it struck me then how unappreciative our generation is of all our blessings. Want some light? Flick a switch. Want some heat? Turn up the thermostat.

Today I appreciate. Today I am that (somewhat older than she was) happy housewife, basking in the heat of our new furnace. Today I remembered to thank my Father for His precious blessings.

I rolled out of bed, and as my feet hit the floor, I realized how warm that floor was. Not to mention the air above the floor! For the first time in almost 2 years, the heat was not dependant upon my lighting a fire, coaxing it to life, then shivering over the top of our woodstove until the heat expanded through the downstairs.

I am spoiled. Spoiled beyond my imagining. Help me to appreciate, Father. Help me to treasure your gifts.

I haveth a furnace-eth!!!

WooHooooooo!! I am basking in the warmth of non-Laura made heat!

And enjoying our cats freaking out as they experience heat blasting out of our registers for the first time in their lives! Boots was sashaying past the register in the bathroom when the fan kicked on. Hilarious! I think he hit a record in direct upwards leaps! Then he had to turn about and stalk the draft....Now he's spending a ridiculous amount of time sitting in the bathroom doorway staring at the register....

I didn't realize how much I missed non-woodstove heat until today! Don't get me wrong, I still firmly believe there's no heat as nice as woodstove heat, but this sure is nice! *sigh* I'm going to go stand on a register for a while.

Another day, another 3,000 things accomplished.

I was tired just thinking about today. That was before the alarm clock even rang. I had a million things to do, arrange etc, plus it being one of my work days.

I did it. The only non-accomplished thing was gift wrapping. Again. The gifts up in my closet are starting to think they might go wrapless this year. *sigh* I wish.

Phone calls done. One to the furnace contractor to check on arrival time. 8-8:30 am. Guess that means I'd better switch getting dressed to the FIRST part of my morning routine! Don't want to scare the poor guys!! Dad needs to be here by 8:30, so he can "be here" while they are. It's a work day for me, so we had a teeny bit of conflict there.

One to the guy who blows out laneways in the village. He apparently never answers his phone, and doesn't have an answering machine, despite owning a business, so that one resulted in a call to Mom & Dad to beg them to keep trying him....as I had to work, plus my cell phone was running out of juice quickly. Mom said "Well, he was just HERE a second ago! I'll try and catch him." Guess that explains why he wasn't answering his phone! Gotta love small towns....I got home to find the path blown for the propane tanks in the side yard, so my guess is Mom was able to "hail him" from her front door in time.

One to my sister and brother-in-law's favourite garage...to see if they could fit the van in for a diagnostic on Monday. "Sure! I have openings before that, if you'd like?", says he. Gotta love small towns! The engine light is on, and it's running rough. "What time?", he asks....Oi...well, school's out, I don't have to work....I'm pretty much open that day. "Well..." says he, "If the kids are out of school and you don't have to work, you won't want to be up at the crack of dawn...how about 11???"

Gotta love small towns and smart men!

Get home from work, grab the checkbook and start running around paying bills. Taxes...check. Up to date for the first time in 3 years. Thank you, Lord.

Funeral home....check. Final payment on James' funeral done. Thanks, God.

I still need to write out the cheque for the furnace. And the propane. And the tanks.

Oi, that home equity money is running out quickly. But...once again, it's enough. The Lord provides. We never have an excess, but we always have "enough"...and that's good enough for me.

Stll got the "blaahs", but other good things are happening!

Brian just called, and said our new furnace is being put in this Thursday! Woohoo!! After 14 months of no furnace, and only woodstove heat, we'll be toasty all the time! This is a big hairy deal in the snowbelt of Ontario. B.I.G. lol

We're going with propane....and Brian wrestled the old oil monster (dead as a doornail) out of the basement a week ago...I helped lug the biggest, heaviest part up those miniature stairs, so I'm taking part credit there! The furnace guy we chose to go with said it was awesome that we took it out....that's what happens with small-town, common-sense contractors. Unlike the bigger-town, money-grubber guy who we talked to first...who tried to inform us we were incapable of taking it out ourselves, and wanted to do it for us- for only another $1000+.

Actually, he informed us we "couldn't" take it out. (ie, not allowed) Them's fighting words to our redneck country selves! That iron puppy didn't stand a chance! Phooey on him!

Anyhoo...the furnace goes in on Thursday, then Brian begged and pleaded for a favour from the OTHER small-town, common-sense contractor who does the tanks and hook-up, and he managed to squeeze us into the schedule on Friday. As opposed to "sometime next month?" we got before from everyone....apparently there's a province-wide propane tank shortage??

We'll still use the woodstove to cut costs....but the house will be warm when we fire it up...as opposed to the bone-chilling temperatures we've endured every morning lately. I have to admit....we did well last winter. The girls were not impressed, but got used to it. And Brian and I were both raised in cold old farmhouses with wood heat, so it was a "blast from the past" for us...I'm very thankful for mystery words like "equity" and "re-finance" though, that let us put in this shiny new friend....sentiment only goes so far.

I may just have to hug it as they carry it in. Now, THAT should start some rumours flying! ;)

Christmas blaahs....

I have to admit it, at last. I can't get "into" this Christmas. Everyone nods graciously, and says "Oh, that's normal.", thinking it's b/c of James' passing. But it isn't that. I can't put my finger on "what" it is, but it isn't about James.

The decorations are up (thanks to Brian and the girls), the shortbread is baked (thanks to my wunder-kind chef nephew, Jonathon), the presents are bought....and sitting, unwrapped for the most part, in my closet upstairs.

This is not me. I usually make the Whos down in Whoville look like Christmas slackers! Normally the Christmas tunes are rocking every available second....the gifts are wrapped by December first and ALL under the tree the second it's up (1st weekend in December, like clockwork)....a large variety of cookies are making their way onto my already burdened hips.....and everyone around me rolls their eyes and waits for the New Year to end my ridiculous frenzy of cheer.

This year, as mentioned, other people have done what is done....the music seems to grate on my nerves, and only shortbread is on the menu. This week both girls have their school Christmas concerts, and at this point, I'd rather have flaming bamboo shoots under my nails.

I hope I can "snap to" sometime in the next 11 days. Christmas should be magicla for my kids....I'm in danger of "outing" Santa myself...me, the 40 year old woman who still believes, wants to "out" him...

I wish I could figure out what is wrong....maybe there's a panaceia I could drink?

How embarrassing!

It's embarrassing to come online to your blog and discover you have forgotten about it for over a YEAR! I would have said it had been a good six months, but a YEAR? No way.

So much has happened in that year too. We found a new Homeshare home for James, and he loved it. He had another father figure in this home, a brother, at last, and three big sisters who spoiled him silly. He was so happy, so content.

And then he passed away. Silently, quietly, peacefully, in his sleep. In his sleep in his own bed, with the "extra" family he loved. Not in the hospital alone, or in pain, as I had feared for 13 1/2 years.

I told B when I was campaigning for baby #3 that I had a hole in my heart that needed to be filled. Now I have a different hole. An aching, ragged, torn, bleeding hole.

But my boy, my handsome guy, is healed. I picture him wreaking havoc in the Heavenly realm....missing haloes, harp strings stretched across the Pearly Gates, and skateboarding, skating and just plain old running in places the Archangels never imagined. Street hockey on streets of gold....who could ask for more?